By Jim Speakman
Welcome to the first issue of Persuasion E-News for 2005. We’ve added many, many new readers from recent live presentations! As always, this is designed to be read in less than 5 minutes and give you hints, tips, tactics, and techniques to get more of what you want more often! Enjoy!
First of all, I want to say Thank You to Sales & Marketing International / Akron for allowing me the opportunity to conduct a pre-dinner workshop and then to be the keynote speaker at their January Dinner at Fairlawn Country Club in Akron. They are a fantastic group of professionals and many of them are new readers of this e-news! Welcome!
Next, I’d like to also thank the Jackson/Belden Chamber of Commerce for allowing me to speak to their breakfast meeting recently. I enjoyed meeting all of you as well … good luck at your upcoming Business Expo!
Today’s topic: The Language of Persuasion!
Do you talk to yourself?
Yes. You do … and that’s ok. Actually, that’s normal. The problem is not that you talk to yourself, it’s what you say when you talk to yourself. You must be extremely careful what you allow yourself to hear. Words have amazing (and highly underestimated) power to control your behavior.
Sell yourself … before you ever attempt to sell anyone else.
I know that not all of you reading are "salespeople." When I use the word sell here, you can read that as "persuade." Look at the quote by Napoleon Hill (the author of the famous Think and Grow Rich). He says that you "… must sell it to (yourself)" first. That’s what I call internal persuasion. You must be thoroughly and completely persuaded to the point of unquestioned belief about your point before you have a chance of persuading someone else to your point of view. To do this there is an internal and then an external Language of Persuasion.
What is the Language of Persuasion?
It comes down to the actual words you speak in your own head (and you may never say them out loud). And then ultimately, it is the actual words that you say when attempting to persuade others. Words have power. Words can lift up. Words can energize. And, yes, words can kill. So, if there is a "language of persuasion" what is it? What kinds of things should you be saying to yourself? What kinds of things should you be saying to others?
The words NOT to say … and the words TO say …
You may not realize that you do this, most people don’t. But your internal voice may be constantly reinforcing negative things by saying things like "I can’t … it’ll never work … I have to … I need … they made me feel … etc." These phrases are stealing energy from you. Most of these small fragments are negative. Most of them position you as the victim. So, realizing you have complete control over what you say to yourself, begin to change it. Instead of these phrases, say things like "I will … I can ... I get to … I feel … etc." These phrases are empowering because they are all starting from you. You are not dependent on the actions of others. Remember, you cannot control the actions of other people in the world, but you can always control and direct your response to the world by the way you talk to yourself.
To persuade others, you must persuade yourself first.
Think about the person you respect the most. What are they like? Do they have a confidence about them? Are they generally positive and pleasant to be around? Do they have the ability to easily gain your cooperation? Why is that? It’s because in their core they believe … they have persuaded themselves first. It’s obvious … it shows through their words and actions. By contrast, there are people you would never cooperate with … people who are wishy-washy and unsure. They haven’t convinced themselves that the course of action they are on is the right one, so obviously they are not going to be successful in persuading you to join them!
Until next time …
During my last several public talks, I’ve been repeatedly asked to write a book and to record CDs and tapes. As a result of these requests, I’ve decided to begin this exciting project. Over the years, I’ve written well over 1,000 pages of original thoughts, observations, positions, and opinions about people and how to persuade them to get your way more often. During that time, I have also read and researched the thinking of the greatest minds of our time on this topic. So, now I’m beginning the process of consolidating all of this information down to a very focused volume. I’m already having a lot of fun! It will probably take several months to finish, but one of my goals is to complete this project and get it published by the end of this year!
Do you have a goal that fills you with excitement at the thought of it? If you don’t (and many, many people don’t), begin creating that new goal today! It’s January … the month of "New Year’s resolutions" … make one now! Then, use the Language of Persuasion to persuade yourself and others to accomplish it!
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